Shielding Aspen Page 20

  “True,” Aspen mused.

  “So…what’d you think?”

  “Of your friends?” she asked, propping herself up to look at him.

  “Yeah.”

  “They’re just as great as they were when we hung out the first time. It’s as if months haven’t passed since then.”

  “Grover and Devyn’s spat notwithstanding,” Kane said on a sigh.

  “Honestly? That made me feel even closer to everyone,” Aspen told him. “I mean, I’m not happy something’s up with them, but the fact that they didn’t hesitate to have it out in front of all you guys…it just means they trust you. That they feel comfortable around you. It was nice, in a weird way. Does that make any sense?”

  “It does,” Kane reassured her.

  Aspen put her head back on his chest. “I’m happy for you, Kane.”

  “For what?”

  “That you have friends who are like family.”

  “They’ll be family for you too, if you let them,” he told her quietly.

  “I know. And it kinda scares me.”

  “It shouldn’t,” Kane said. “They’re good people. Anything you need, they’ll be there for you.”

  Aspen let that sink in. It felt nice. And she freaking loved knowing that Kane had such loyal friends at his back. It made the missions she knew he’d be sent on in the future not seem so scary. Trigger, Lefty, Oz, Lucky, Doc, and Grover would do whatever it took to make sure Kane came home, just as he’d do for them. She couldn’t say the same about her own team, which sucked.

  As the day got closer to when she was going to have to make a decision about her reenlistment, Aspen already knew she was leaning more and more heavily toward getting out. She was sad about that, as she’d been so excited the day she’d learned she was attached to a Ranger team. But as hard as she’d tried, she hadn’t been able to fit in, not the way she wanted.

  And for the first time, she wondered if her presence on the team was hindering the other men from connecting the way they should.

  That thought was painful, but she couldn’t deny it might be true.

  “What are you thinking about so hard?” Kane asked.

  “Nothing much,” Aspen said. How could she admit out loud that she felt as if she’d failed? Once upon a time, she’d wanted to make a difference. Wanted to pave the way for her fellow women soldiers to be able to join whatever unit they wanted.

  “I’m proud of you,” Kane whispered. “You’ve worked your ass off to be where you are today, and even if your team can’t appreciate it, I’ve seen for myself how much of an asset you are to the Army, and to the Rangers.”

  And just like that, Aspen felt better. “Thanks,” she told him quietly.

  “I know we haven’t gone there yet, except for that one night, which I’m not sure counts since it was accidental, but…do you want to stay tonight?”

  Aspen’s heart rate spiked.

  “Not for sex. Just to sleep. Neither of us has to go to work in the morning, and I thought it might be nice to fall asleep with you in my arms and wake up to your beautiful face in the morning.”

  Aspen couldn’t think of anything better. She lifted up to look at him again. “It depends…what are you gonna make me for breakfast?”

  He smiled. “Whatever you want, hubibi.”

  “I can’t even begin to guess what language that was,” she said with a laugh.

  “Arabic.”

  “Right. And I was teasing. I’m not much of a breakfast person. As long as you have coffee, I’m good.”

  “I’ve got coffee,” he told her, smiling. “And I can go out and get some fresh doughnuts or kolaches if you want.”

  “Oooh, I want,” Aspen told him.

  “Deal.”

  She lay her head back on his chest and sighed in contentment. She loved making out with Kane. Loved how he always put his hand on the back of her neck and held her still as he took what he wanted. But she also loved this. The feel of his hand on her back, gently stroking. The sound of his heart beating in his chest under her ear.

  For the first time, she admitted to herself that she was addicted to Kane Temple. Not a day went by when she didn’t think about him. The fact that they could also be in the same room together, each doing their own thing, was just icing on the cake. She didn’t have to entertain him; he didn’t have to entertain her. They were comfortable with each other, and that was something she’d never had with anyone else in her life.

  Kane could be the one.

  She could see them fifty years from now, lying just like this, simply soaking in each other’s company. And she liked that thought…a hell of a lot.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The park was packed.

  Aspen hadn’t been to an organizational day in a very long time. Since she didn’t have kids, and none of the teams she’d been on had attended together, she’d just never gone.

  But walking around with Kane and their friends was a blast. She especially loved holding Kane’s hand. Since this was a social event and they were in civilian clothes, public displays of affection weren’t frowned upon. Kane had grabbed ahold of her hand as soon as they’d gotten out of his car and hadn’t let go once.

  They’d met up with his team and had wandered around the park, getting the lay of the land. Kane said hello to what seemed like almost everyone. Sometimes he stopped to chat for a minute or two; other times he gave a simple chin lift in greeting.

  “You know a lot of people,” she observed after he’d greeted what seemed like the hundredth person.

  He shrugged. “Been stationed here a while, and the team and I try to stay busy when we’re in town, volunteering and helping out.”

  “How come we never met before that night at the bar?” Aspen asked.

  Kane looked at her. “Don’t take this the wrong way, okay?”

  Aspen couldn’t help but tense.

  “Breathe, dar. And before you ask, that was Kurdish.”

  Aspen let out a breath. “Right. I asked. Hit me.”

  “Never,” he muttered. Then said in a more normal tone, “I’m guessing your team doesn’t do a lot of volunteering on the base?”

  He stated it as a question, but it was obvious he already knew the answer. Aspen shook her head.

  “Right. So before we met, your days consisted of going to work, then going home and decompressing.”

  Aspen thought about it, then nodded.

  “You didn’t have much of a chance to run across me or my team,” Kane said. “And don’t think I’m judging you. I’m not. You needed the time away from post for your own sanity. I get it. With the way you’ve been treated, I can’t blame you for wanting to go home and not hang around anyone from work.”

  “I still feel stupid for dating Derek,” Aspen muttered.

  “Don’t. Guys like him are good at only letting women see what he wants them to. He only showed who he really was after you rejected him,” Kane said easily.

  “It doesn’t bother you to talk about my past boyfriends?” Aspen asked, genuinely curious as to his answer.

  Kane stopped and put his free hand on the side of her neck, his thumb rubbing along the underside of her jaw. It felt good. Really good.

  “No,” Kane said simply. “I’m not saying I want you to go into a blow-by-blow, no pun intended, of your history, but you’re thirty-one years old and gorgeous. I know you’ve had plenty of boyfriends.”

  “Not that many,” she told him.

  But Kane just grinned. “I like having an older and wiser girlfriend.”

  “I’m only a year older than you, Kane, let’s not get crazy.”

  His smile widened. “You’re a cougar. Grrrrrr.”

  Aspen burst out laughing and playfully shoved his shoulder. “Shut up.”

  Kane caught her around the waist and pulled her into him. He leaned in and kissed her, a hard and fast meeting of their lips that was over way too soon.

  And in that moment, Aspen realized that she was done waiting for him to
make the first move. She hadn’t pushed to go further than they had as far as their physical relationship went. But feeling his hard body against hers in the middle of a family friendly carnival made a bolt of lust shoot through her. She wanted him. Bad.

  “What was that thought?” he asked.

  Licking her lips, Aspen leaned into him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. She nuzzled his ear for a moment, then whispered, “I loved sleeping with you last night.”

  She heard a contended rumble deep in his throat as he agreed.

  Feeling daring, Aspen nipped his earlobe, loving the shiver that ran through Kane. “Can I stay with you again tonight?” she asked.

  “You’re welcome anytime,” he said quietly. His hands had moved to her waist, and she felt one slip under her T-shirt. How she wanted that hand to do more than just gently caress her lower back. She wanted to feel his hands all over her.

  “I want you,” she admitted softly in his ear.

  Every muscle in Kane’s body stiffened. She felt his cock harden against her…and smiled.

  He pulled back, but kept her plastered to his front, studying her for a long moment. “You sure?” he finally asked.

  “Yes,” Aspen told him simply.

  Then the most beautiful smile formed on his lips.

  She could stare at his smile all day, but they were interrupted by shouting from nearby. They both turned to see a group of boys on the obstacle course equipment that had been set up on one side of the park. They were facing a girl, who was standing in front of them with her hands on her hips.

  “Shit, that’s Annie,” Kane said, looking around. “I don’t see Fletch or Emily. Come on,” he said, pulling away and heading for the kids.

  Aspen wasn’t sure who Fletch and Emily were, but she recognized the name Annie. She was the little girl who Gillian had watched compete in an obstacle course race a while ago. She was the daughter of one of the Deltas on another team. Looking around as they headed for the confrontation, Aspen didn’t see the guys from Kane’s team either. They must’ve been lost in each other for longer than she’d thought, and his team had gotten ahead of them as they continued to wander the park.

  “You’re a girl,” one of the boys sneered. “You can’t play with us.”

  “Why not?” Annie demanded, sounding irritated.

  “Because,” another boy said. “You’re slower and weaker.”

  “I am not!” Annie protested.

  “Are so!”

  “My dad says girls should stay in their lane and do things like ballet and cheerleading and leave the dangerous stuff to guys.”

  Aspen frowned at that. She hated knowing there were still men who thought that shit. Was even more irritated that they were teaching their sons to be discriminatory as well.

  “That’s stupid,” Annie said, but her tone lacked the self-confidence it had a moment ago.

  “Why don’t you go over to the arts and crafts tent where you can make something you can use in the kitchen?” one of the boys taunted.

  Before Aspen and Kane could reach them, Annie rushed forward, kicked the boy who’d just spoken in the shin, then stalked toward the obstacle course, ignoring the other boys, who were now yelling at her.

  “I’ve got Annie, if you take care of the boys,” Aspen told Kane.

  He nodded, and she saw a muscle in his jaw ticking.

  Squeezing Kane’s hand before she dropped it, Aspen jogged over to where Annie was on her belly crawling under a set of ropes strung across the ground.

  “Hey,” she said as she approached.

  Annie looked up, but didn’t say anything.

  “I’m Aspen. You’re Annie, right?”

  “How do you know my name? I’m not supposed to talk to strangers,” she said sulkily.

  “My boyfriend is friends with your dad,” Aspen told her. She wasn’t sure exactly how well Kane knew Fletch, but she figured that didn’t matter at the moment.

  Annie merely shrugged.

  “I heard what those boys said to you. I hope you aren’t taking their words to heart.”

  The little girl pulled herself out from under the ropes, but didn’t stand. She stayed on her belly and looked up at Aspen. “What’s it to you?”

  The teenage attitude wasn’t exactly unexpected, and Aspen gave the girl a pass since she was obviously upset. “I hate when boys say stuff that’s so blatantly untrue. It’s true that some girls are weaker than boys, but a blanket statement like that is just stupid.”

  She saw that Annie seemed a little more interested in listening to what she had to say, so Aspen kept going.

  “I mean, look at me. I’m not as tall as some men are, but I’m also not exactly short. I might not be able to do as many pullups as the men on my team, but I can do way more sit-ups than them.”

  “What kind of team are you on?” Annie asked, sitting up and crossing her legs.

  Aspen sat on the ground next to her and said, “A Ranger team.”

  At the look on the little girl’s face, Aspen smirked. She had her attention now.

  “You’re a Ranger?” she asked, the awe easy to hear in her tone.

  “Well, not technically. I’m a combat medic attached to a Ranger unit. So that means that wherever they go, I go. Whatever they do, I do. I have to be in just as good shape as they are in order to keep up with them. It wouldn’t do for me to fall behind, especially if a firefight broke out and someone got hurt. I need to be there to help patch them up.”

  “Do you have to kill people?”

  Aspen winced at the question, but did her best to answer honestly. “My main job is making sure the guys on my team are healthy. But yes, sometimes I have to engage in combat alongside my team. I protect them, just as they protect me. But my primary job is to be a doctor for them, not to kill people.”

  “I want to do that,” Annie whispered.

  Aspen felt more proud at that moment than she could remember being in a very long time. If she could inspire a girl like Annie, then it felt as if she was doing something right. “It’s not an easy job,” she warned.

  “I know. But you get to do all the cool stuff without having to shoot people all the time. That’s what I want to do. I know girls aren’t allowed in the Deltas, like what my dad is, but he told me that there are women in the Rangers now. I read about the Rangers online, and while I know I can make it through the training, because I’m tough, I don’t really want to have to shoot people. But maybe I can be a combat medic like you and still do what the Rangers do.”

  Aspen smiled. “I have a feeling you can do anything you set your mind to. But…one thing you’re going to have to do is control your temper. You can’t go around kicking people if you’re going to be a combat medic.”

  Annie frowned. “Mikey’s a poophole.”

  Aspen wanted to laugh, but managed to control herself. The girl had obviously been warned about swearing and was doing her best to not disobey her parents, but still get her point across. “Be that as it may, there will be lots of poopholes you’ll have to deal with if you want to be a combat medic attached to a Ranger team. A lot of people still don’t think women can physically do the job. And they’ll tell you that over and over, to try to get you to quit. You’ll have to work twice as hard as a man to get the job too. It’s not fair, but if you want it bad enough, if you can show the officers in charge that you’re the best person for the job and that you can do it without losing your temper, then you’ll get it.”

  Annie studied her. “Being a girl is hard,” she said after a minute.

  Aspen laughed. “It can be, especially when you want to do something that in the past has mostly been done by boys. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go after what you want. It might be harder, but when you accomplish it, you’ll feel twice as good as the boy because you worked hard for it.”

  Annie nodded.

  “I heard you’re pretty darn good at the obstacle course.”

  “I am,” Annie said without a shred of bashfulness. />
  “Want to run through it with me?” Aspen asked.

  “Sure.”

  Aspen stood with Annie and they went to the beginning of the course. Kane had finished talking with the boys and was standing off to the side having a conversation with his team. Gillian and Kinley were there too, and they both waved when they saw Aspen looking in their direction. Aspen waved back, then returned her attention to Annie.

  “You go first,” Annie said, and once again Aspen had to hide her smile. It was obvious the girl didn’t quite believe that Aspen could manage the obstacle course; it was going to be fun to show her otherwise.

  Glad that she’d decided to wear a pair of jean shorts and a loose T-shirt today, Aspen nodded at Annie and started going through the course. It wasn’t all that hard, since it was set up for the kids to run through, but it wasn’t a walk in the park either.

  She scrambled under the ropes, ran toward the wall and climbed up and over it without hesitation. Then she climbed up a pole and rang the bell at the top before sliding back down. She leaped over three logs and jumped up and grabbed a horizontal pole. Flinging one leg up and over it, she shimmied hand over hand across it, upside down, before using her leg muscles to pull her on top of the pole. She sat atop it and reached for the bell hanging above her head.

  Hearing applause, Aspen looked down and saw Annie jumping up and down and clapping her hands enthusiastically. She’d drawn an audience, and everyone who’d been watching her was clapping as well. Flushing, Aspen flipped herself over and hung from the pole by her hands for a second before dropping to the ground.

  “You’re good!” Annie said, her eyes dancing. “Will you teach me how to do that leg thing on the pole? My arms are usually really tired by the time I get to that point and it’s hard for me to pull myself up to get to the bell.”

  Loving that Annie was asking for assistance, Aspen said, “Of course. I’m happy to help. Just remember, you might be strong, but you need to save your strength whenever possible. Work smarter, not harder. And that means using your leg muscles wherever you can.”

  Annie nodded.

  “Come on, let’s start at the beginning. You show me what you can do, and I’ll give you pointers along the way, all right?”